april 29 & 30 | side show

It's that time of year again!  SIDE SHOW COMEDY IMPROV is coming, April 29 & 30th.  Some familiar faces that are making their triumphant return to the stage include:

Frank Nickel
PT Production Manager

Alison Chisholm
PT Administrator

David C. Jones
Local Improv-er Extraordinaire
and Side Show regular

Phil Miguel
PT Apprentice

Evan Frayne
PT Apprentice

Side Show: Comedy Improv with a Dash of Chaos
April 29 & 30
Pacific Theatre
http://www.pacifictheatre.org

may 4-7 | on the verge | frank nickel, kerri norris

Frank is our production manager at PT, and you've seen him onstage in Side Show (coming up in two weeks!). Well, he's also in three (!) other theatre companies, one of which (Shadows & Dreams) also features PT regular Kerri Norris - Jesus Hopped The 'A' Train, Refuge Of Lies, You Can't Take It With You. Up next...

On The Verge (Or The Geography of Yearning)
by Eric Overmyer
The Havana Theatre | 1212 Commercial Drive
May 4 5 6 7 | 8pm
Tickets $15 at the door
To reserve a seat or for more information call 604 515-0704

Directed by Nicole DesLauriers
Featuring: Patricia Johnson-Brooke, Frank Nickel, Kerri Norris and Kathleen Pollard

In 1888, three experienced American lady adventurers armed with umbrellas, a picnic and pith helmets, set out on their greatest trek that takes them through the wilds of the jungle, the mountain heights of the Himalayas and through time itself.

"Blending Tom Stoppard's limber linguistics with the historic overview of a Thornton Wilder, Mr Overmyer takes his audience on a mirthful safari, spinning into time travel. Three `sister sojourners', each a prototypical Victorian lady explorer, equipped with dialog as pithy as their helmets, thwack their machetes through the wilderness while telling tales of past jaunts among the natives. Heroines to their heart, the explorers can accommodate themselves to any emergency (natural or man-made). A frolicsome jaunt through a continuum of space, time, history, geography, feminism and fashion, Mr Overmyer's cavalcade is on the verge of becoming a thoroughly serendipitous journey.”
Mel Gussow, The New York Times

hell | the great divorce

All of a sudden, hell is big news. Front cover of Time Magazine, in fact. Along with a swell history of the place.

I wonder. Maybe we ought to stage The Great Divorce, see what C.S. Lewis thinks about the whole business...

sep 8-12 | image seminar | rembrandt

I have many friends who've taken part in these IMAGE Seminars in the past, and I can pretty much guarantee: if you can join them, you won't regret it. Rich, rich experiences.

The IMAGE Seminars
Human Face, Holy Face: Rembrandt and the Spiritual Dimensions of the Portrait
with Ted and Catherine Prescott and Gregory Wolfe

September 8-12, 2011. Registration open now!

Dear friend of Image:

How would you like to be part of an intimate event with Image and visual artists Ted and Cathy Prescott in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania this November?

This is your personal invitation to join the Prescotts and me for an extended weekend of lively discussion and contemplation based around the exhibit "Rembrandt and the Face of Jesus" at the renowned Philadelphia Museum of Art.

The Philadelphia Seminar builds on previous events hosted by Image--the Florence Seminar in Italy, the Oahu Seminar with Kathleen Norris, and the Charleston Seminar with Bret Lott. These gatherings get to the heart of Image's mission: bringing together people who care passionately about the way that art and faith can renew culture.

And because these events are built around dialogue and communion, they often result in powerful bonds and lasting friendships--that's the best part of all.

The theme for our time together in Philadelphia is "Human Face, Holy Face: Rembrandt and the Spiritual Dimensions of the Portrait." While portraiture has long been associated with the revelation of character, Rembrandt's portraits stand out in their ability to communicate something transcendent in the midst of the ordinary. His portraits of Jesus relate both the human and the holy.

During the seminar we will view these portraits as well as contemporary works. The Prescotts will speak about the making of portraits and the historical context for Rembrandt's work, and will open a conversation about the way contemporary art might restore us to a fuller understanding of our own humanity.

Clicking on this link will take you to our web page on "Human Face, Holy Face" where you can download a pdf version of the brochure. If you'd like the printed brochure just e-mail Dyana Herron with your mailing address and we'll mail one off to you right away.

The brochure contains more details about where we will stay and what we will do as we explore both our theme and historic "Old City" Philadelphia. Once again, we've worked hard to make this event affordable.

We hope you'll give some thought to registering soon. Please call or email soon if you are interested in joining us. We have room for less than thirty people, so this event is going to fill quickly.

Click here to find out more about "Human Face, Holy Face: Rembrandt at the Spiritual Dimensions of the Portrait."

Yours,

Gregory Wolfe

may 5 etc | art at regent

may 5 8pm | evening public lecture
david o. taylor
art, the holy spirit, fig trees and the problem of abundance

may 11 - jun 17 | lookout gallery
richard jesse watson
art pray love: illustrations for the lord's prayer, text by rick warren

may 20 7:30pm | concert
michael harris
pebbles from the pilgrim path

jun 1 8pm | evening public lecture
sharon jebb smith
of mirth and misery: some literary and theological reflections


even better, regent's got a heap of summer school courses on the arts

may 6 | sheree plett + engine and the end

Sheree Plett and Engine and the End
may 6 8pm

Cafe Deux Soleils
2096 Commercial Drive
Vancouver, BC

$10 at the door.

jake's gift | farewell

Jake's Gift closed its run at Pacific Theatre last Saturday evening. While we may have already reset the theatre in preparation for our next show (a two night run of SIDE SHOW COMEDY IMPROV), we sure miss have our friends Julia Mackey and Dirk Van Stralen around the theatre every day.  Well, apparently they missed us too, look what just got delivered to the theatre!

Thanks for the flowers and card, Jules and Dirk, hope Jake enjoys his visit to Toronto!

For those of you who are sad to have missed this beautiful show, the touring schedule for JAKE'S GIFT is always up-to-date on http://www.jakesgift.com, or look for the facebook group.

to apr 30 | mambo italiano | gina chiarelli, david adams

Though it's been a while since we got her onto our stage, Gina Chiarelli is a beloved part of our company - Prodigal Son, The Fever, and if you go even further back, a whole string of Murder Mysteries . Well, there's a chance to see that girl on stage (though not ours) for the next couple weeks... | Oh! And digging further, I find out that David Adams is in the show too! You'll remember him from Jesus My Boy, a couple Christmases ago. Them's a pair of heavy hitters! Sounds like this is one to hurry out and see.

MAMBO ITALIANO
Apr 13 - 30 | 8pm + 2pm sat/sun | pay-what-you-can mat apr 20 27
Firehall Arts Centre

Great reviews from Kamloops! "Mambo Italiano - is a smash hit!", "In the hands of this capable cast, its hilarious" Click here for the full review!

Bound to be a Vancouver favourite in the spring, even the title Mambo Italiano gets your feet going. Canadian playwright Steve Galluccio's hugely successful Mambo Italiano is a refreshing and feel good comedy presented by the Firehall Arts Centre and Western Theatre Company.

Thirty-something Angelo Barberini, the oddball son of Italian immigrants living in Montreal, surprises his family by moving out on his own without getting married, and much to the shock of his conservative Catholic family, announces he is gay.

Once out on his own, Angelo runs into his childhood friend Nino Paventi who is also gay and deeply in the closet. Angelo and Nino rekindle their friendship, start a romance and end up sharing an apartment. Together at home, they live in coupled bliss, but outside of the house they retain their separate straight acting lives. Angelo decided that he finally wants to announce their relationship, but this decision does not sit well with Nino who fears judgement from his family. Both families struggle to come to terms with their sons' new lives, eventually planning a setup dinner in the desperate hope of "converting" their sons.

A theatrical phenonmenon, Mambo Italiano is about the dynamics of family, the vast distance between old world sensibilites and the new and about grasping the resonant codes embeddded in what is said and what is meant in ordinary speech. This funny yet poignant story is not all farce, under all the comedic acting there is a seriousness about tolerance for persons of all sexual persuasions.

A Firehall Arts Centre/Western Canada Theatre Production.

jp allen | centaur

screening at PT in July

coffee & language

jake's gift | poppy fund

Not long after beginning her first tour of JAKE'S GIFT, Julia Mackey decided to give something back. She designed three pins, sold as a pack for $5, with all revenue going straight to The Poppy Fund.

We are proud to announce that so far we have raised over $600 for The Poppy Fund!

Four shows left, let's keep it coming!

apr 14-16 | basic training | kahlil ashanti

Heard about this one through friends at Tenth Church.

Basic Training
Apr 14/15/16 8pm
Culture Lab @ The Cultch

A family secret, the U.S. Air Force, hip hop, mambo and non-stop laughs all come together in a hilarious and redemptive night out when comedian Kahlil Ashanti performs his award-winning one hour theatrical show Basic Training.

Adorned with the Scotsman Fringe First Award, a New York Times Critics Pick accolade and nominated for a Broadway Drama League Award for “Distinguished Performance”, Ashanti’s autobiographical show chronicles his time in the U.S. Air Force as a member of the elite entertainment troupe “Tops in Blue” where he learned to serve his country using his talent as his weapon. The night before Ashanti leaves for boot camp, his mother reveals a shocking family secret that forces Kahlil to question his reasons for leaving. Along the way Ashanti comes of age, discovers his roots, and learns what the real “Basic Training” of life is all about.

Tickets:$20 (adults) / $15 (students)

tickets

stuff about his off-broadway run

jake's gift | responses

"Jake’s Gift may be short, but it’s long on historical and emotional impact, relevance and raw talent. The gift it gives is a light-hearted but never lightweight reminder that those who die in armed combat are never forgotten by those who loved them." | Jo Ledingham, The Vancouver Courier

"I was rivetted to my seat by the extraordinary acting and transformation in this moving one woman show." | William Hays

"Julia Mackey’s well crafted, courageously acted challenging blend of comedy and drama about the best and worst effects of war on the human psyche should be seen by anyone who values the sacrifices others have made on our behalf." | John Jane, Review Vancouver

"What an honour to be in the audience this past weekend of Jake's Gift. This is the forth time I have seen the show and it continues to move me in new and powerful ways. My date said it was hand down the best show she had seen in her entire life! I have written everyone I care about to tell them they must not miss the show." | Sarah Louise Turner, Email

"Just a quick note to let you know that I was incredibly impressed with Jake’s Gift. I had heard great things from the friend who recommended it to me, so my expectations were quite high. The show far exceeded those expectations, it was nothing short of fantastic! Thank you!" | Jacqueline Spray, Email

"Mackey's stunning performance displays Jake's naked vulnerability as he clicks his shiny boots and salutes the mirror in his navy blue veteran's blazer adorned with medals of honour." | Maziar Ghaderi, Shahrgon

"In an era where the meaning of the poppy and Remembrance Day seems to diminish each year, Jake’s Gift, Julia Mackey’s touching tribute to our fighting men (and women), is just what this country needs to remind us of the ultimate sacrifices made." | Mark Robins, Gayvancouver.net

"This show is a real treasure. I can still picture the vignettes – amazing when you realize I saw it a couple of years ago and there is no set to speak of. Bring the kids (10 & up?). You’ll be glad you did." | audience comment, website

"The story Julia Mackey has created with “Jake’s Gift” is simple and accessible, short and sweet. It is neither for nor against war. The story just is, and its lack of complication did not diminish the experience for me. Mackey’s investment in the piece as a creator, an actor, and a person, is evident. To me, “Jake’s Gift” has a bittersweet spirit that serves as a gentle reminder that November is not the only time of year to remember the sacrifices of others, and to, as always, respect our elders, who have experienced moments in their lives we will hopefully never have to know." | Nifty Not Cool

"Jake's Gift was a fantastic piece of theatre. The simplicity of Mackey's performance reminded me that good theatre certainly does not need a flashy set or technical display. A single, passionately engaged artist with a story to tell is enough to draw even the most "sophisticated" audiences into her tale. Julia Mackey did this as she told the beautiful story of Jake and Petite Isabelle. I was blown away by this story, and walked out of PT with much to reflect on - another mark of excellent artistry. Thank you Pacific Theatre for yet again bringing us another work of art to experience." | Shayna Jones, email

"Julia did a fantastic and very convincing job as the 4 characters - it was tender and heart warming and such skilled acting. Bravo!" | Jeanne Legare, email

"I was deeply impressed with Jake's Gift. The actress was able to seamlessly transition from one role to another without any distraction to me as a viewer. If plays are supposed to reach one's emotions, then one was 'right on' as I sobbed to its conclusion. Wonderful experience and worth the two hour drive from Stanwood, Washington." | John J. Shaffer, email

april 13-16 | letter from a soldier | phil miguel

Apprentice Phil Miguel will be performing LETTER FROM A SOLDIER: MY NAME IS ASLAM at about 9:30pm following performances of JAKE'S GIFT next week.  If you've already got tickets to JAKE then you can stay free for LETTER - or come to the theatre at around 9pm and pay-what-you-can.

Letter From A Soldier: My Name Is Aslam
written by Deb Victorof
performed by Phil Miguel
April 13-16 (after Jake's Gift)
Pay-what-you-can (or FREE if you're seeing Jake's Gift)
For tickets: call 604.731.5518 or visit http://www.pacifictheatre.org/

A US soldier stationed in Iraq writes home and finds that caring can be just as hard as not caring as he reflects on his friendships with the locals in Baghdad.

Performances following Jake's Gift at approximately 9:30pm
20 minutes in length

Directed by Frank Nickel
Stage Managed by Becky MacDormand

An apprentice showcase.

Audience advisory: this performance contains offensive language.

april 16 | dance and movement workshop

Les Petites Taquines is a dance company founded by PT publicist Andrea Loewen (yours truly), former apprentice/technical director Linsy Rotar, and friends-of-PT Jackie Falkner and Francine Dulong (Francine worked front-of-house for Godspell). Come April 16th we're hosting a dance and movement workshop at TWU!

Dance and Movement Workshop
-four hours of yoga, contemporary dance, physical theatre, and tap with Les Petites Taquines-
April 16 | 10am-2:15pm
Freedom Hall, Trinity Western University, 7600 Glover Rd.
$30 for all four classes | $10 a class
Class sizes limited - email lespetitestaquines@gmail.com to reserve your spot!

Yoga - Andrea Loewen - 10-11am
A fun, uplifting, and refreshing hatha yoga class to connect your mind and body and prepare for the day.

Contemporary - Jackie Faulkner - 11-12pm
Grew up taking dance class or just love busting out some moves in your bedroom? Come take a class in Contemporary a mix of classical technique and modern lines. You'll do a couple plies, try a couple turns and hear me yell phrases like 'move organically', 'expression, more expression', and 'can someone please show me how to work this stereo?'

Physical Theatre- Francine Dulong - 12:15-1:15pm
Do you like telling stories with your body? Intruiged by non verbal performance? Or just like clowning around? Come explore the magical world of mime, gesture, and movement performance (based on world renowned theories of Jacques Lecoq).

Tap - Linsy Rotar - 1:15-2:15pm
If you don't have tap shoes, bring your hardest soled flat shoes. You know, the ones where everyone can hear you coming! We'll start with basic moves and gradually try trickier ones, playing with rhythm all the while.

jul 11-17 | wayfarer arts conference | england

Some years ago I took part in an unforgettable arts conference at Schloss Mittersill in Austria. The Schloss conferences ended a couple years back, and now Jez Carr (who was at Regent for a few years) and playwright Murray Watts are taking up the torch.

Wayfarer Arts Conference

Lee Abbey (Devon, UK) are hosting a conference for Christians in the arts this summer, 11th-17th July. Prices start at £299 all in. Lee Abbey is a beautiful retreat centre, housed in an estate comprising 280 acres of woodland, farmland and shoreline. The programme will provide plenty of space to soak up the scenery, walk in Exmoor National Park, swim in the sea, prop up the bar, build relationships, or even do some art if you feel so inclined. And there will be opportunities to dig into various questions related to following Christ as an artist, through talks, discussions etc. More information here.

jake's gift | green room

Julia Mackey has been touring JAKE'S GIFT for three years now, so it's no surprise she's found a way to make every green room her "home".  Check out the setup she brought with her to PT:

A collection of buttons, photos, and memorabilia from her various "80-year old boyfriends" that she's met across the country, as well as a few little pieces of home.  She tries to add a piece from every new place she brings Jake.

A close up of some of her pins.

jake's gift | ticket winner

Congratulations to Arnica Skulstad-Brown for winning our E-Card ticket giveaway for Jake's Gift!

Want to win free tickets to our shows?  Sign up for our e-card list here!  We do a contest for every show and give away a pair of tickets.

Disclaimer: we have full email inboxes, just like you, so we promise to only send you an email when we have something new to tell you.

apr 8-23 | damon calderwood in the forbidden phoenix

He was the officious dad with a heart of gold in CHRISTMAS ON THE AIR, the ambitious betrayer who should have been a teacher in A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS, the elephant man in THE ELEPHANT MAN. If you go back as far as THE PACIFIC SALT COMPANY or the annual MURDER MYSTERY FUNDRAISERS, he was in those too. Now...

Richmond Gateway Theatre presents
The Forbidden Phoenix
Book and Lyrics by Marty Chan
Lyrics, Music and Orchestration by Robert Walsh

Combining adventure, martial arts and the coolest ten-piece orchestra you’ve ever seen, this thrilling, eye-popping musical tells the story of a father who comes to Canada looking for a better life. The Monkey King, Chinese mythology’s most beloved super hero, must rescue a damsel in distress and tame the Iron Dragon before he can be reunited with his son. High drama and visual spectacle combine for a unique evening of family entertainment. Performed in English with Chinese surtitles (like this...)

apr 17 | eastside story guild

jake's gift | artistic director's notes

Jake's Gift was born in a three-week full-time intensive Mask Characterization workshop Pacific Theatre offered early in 2002. Based on the work of Libby Appel, then Artistic Director of the Oregon Shakespeare Festival and previously my acting teacher and mentor at CalArts, the intensely physical process led about a dozen established and emerging actors through a journey that culminated in the creation of remarkably rich and complex characters. Perhaps the richest and most complex of them all was Jake Spleen, a crusty and isolated World War Two vet who struck up an uneasy friendship with a little girl in a park - the story-line that became the spine of Mercy Wild, the collective creation which came out of that workshop process and which Pacific Theatre premiered in December of that year.

It was obvious that Julia Mackey had an extraordinary transformative ability as an actor. But that came as no surprise to anyone who had seen her work in a dizzying array of other roles: Jules is a chameleon. The revelation was that she also possessed an innate sense of story: in exercise after exercise, fully-formed narratives kept emerging from her fertile imagination. Not just great situations, but great stories. Beginning, middle, end. Set-up, discovery, surprise, reversal, revelation, resolution - all those tools in the story-teller's tool box seemed to come to hand without effort.

So it seemed inevitable when Julia decided to make Jake his own show. Not only had she discovered a character she couldn't walk away from, she came to realize what a deep and abiding respect and affection she had for the people who have served in Canada's wars and conflicts all over the world. So, endless interviews and books and conversations later, after a research trip to Normandy to see Canadian veterans honoured, and following hundreds of performances for audiences all across Canada... Jake returns to Pacific Theatre.

Welcome home, Jake.

Jake's Gift runs Apr 6 - 16 at Pacific Theatre

details | tickets

photo credit: this is a snapshot Jules took 

on her visit to the ceremonies honouring Canadian veterans at Normandy 

apr 22 | mystical bond / st john chrysostom | vcc

THE MYSTICAL BOND: Rachmaninov and Raminsh

8 pm Friday, April 22

Orpheum Theatre

Vancouver Chamber Choir

Pacifica Singers ~ Vancouver Cantata Singers

Vancouver Chamber Orchestra

Jon Washburn, conductor

Meet composer Imant Raminsh

at a pre-concert talk at 7:00 pm

VANCOUVER, CANADA - Celebrating their 40th anniversary season, the Vancouver Chamber Choir and Artistic Director Jon Washburn are pleased to present THE MYSTICAL BOND Rachmaninov and Raminsh at 8pm Good Friday, April 22 at the Orpheum Theatre. The title piece by BC composer Imant Raminsh will be premiered, plus there will be performances by the Vancouver Cantata Singers, Pacifica Singers, and the Vancouver Chamber Orchestra, with Jon Washburn conducting.

The Vancouver Chamber Choir and guests will perform a cappella wonders from the Slavonic Liturgy by the Russian master Sergei Rachmaninov and then a world premiere of the latest new work by Imant Raminsh, The Mystical Bond - a multi-language tribute to universal brotherhood.

The Mystical Bond is the final composition of the Vancouver Chamber Choir's six 40th anniversary commissions supported by the Arts Partners in Creative Development. The first five commissions were premiered during the Choir's 2009-2010 concert season and in the fall of 2010. They were Sir John Tavener's Miroir des Poèmes, Peter Berring's Hervor, Maiden King, R. Murray Schafer's The Love that Moves the Universe, Tarik O'Regan's Solitude Trilogy, and Stephen Chatman's Magnificat.

John William Trotter will give an introduction to both works and talk with Imant Raminsh during a free pre-concert interview at 7pm.

Repertoire

Sergei Rachmaninov - Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom

Imant Raminsh - The Mystical Bond (Songs of Brotherhood)

jake's gift | playwright's notes

A note from JAKE'S GIFT playwright and performer Julia Mackey.

Photo by Tim Matheson

In the spring of 2002 Ron Reed invited me to be part of a three week intensive mask characterization workshop. He said it was one of the most amazing workshops he had every experienced. He had taken it himself at college and the experience enabled him to create a fully developed character that he knew inside out and backwards in every situation. I loved the idea of creating and learning every aspect of a character as both an actor and writer and jumped at the chance to partake. On day one of the workshop we were asked to choose a mask that we felt drawn to. The mask I chose looked to me like an old man. Through intensive physical, vocal and improv exercises over those three weeks, Jake was born. He was a cheeky, grumpy old man with a well hidden heart of gold who told it like it was regardless of who was listening. I fell in love with him, and knew I wanted to create another piece around him. The storyline I had started to build in that workshop was about three brothers and their connection to WW2. In the summer of 2004, I travelled to Normandy, France for the 60th Anniversary of D-Day. I spent six days interviewing dozens of veterans who had returned for the anniversary and slowly through my interviews and my own experiences in France, Jake's story started to evolve. In 2007, we started performing Jake's Gift at festivals, theatres and schools across Canada. To date we have performed Jake's Gift over 400 times for more than 60 000 people, in 100 communities across Canada from coast to coast to coast. We are thrilled to be bringing Jake "home" to Pacific Theatre, where he first came to life exactly nine years ago. It is an event we've been anticipating all year, and we couldn't be happier to be part of Pacific Theatre's 2010/11 Season.

apr 7 - may 7 | rose-marie goodwin | bellevue gallery

Apr 7- May 7
Opening Reception | Thu Apr 7  6-8pm

The Gallery is pleased to welcome Rose-Marie as she joins our family of artists with her vibrant exhibition Across the Jordan. This series of work is inspired by her journey to the Judean Desert, the Jordan River, the Dead Sea and the Masada ruins. The vibrant, rich colours and bold brush strokes found in Rose-Marie’s paintings embody the essence of the desert, and invite the viewer to embrace her journey of discovery.

Bellevue Gallery
2475 Bellevue Avenue, West Vancouver

apr 1 | the text message | eugene petersen

IMAGE Journal sends out a weekly ImageUpdate email packed with Soul Tidbits. In addition to a number of other articles of interest, there's news of a new publication that will have Eugene Petersen fans twittering with delight. Need to get me a copy, check out UGn's take on I Corinthians 3:18.

The Text Message: The Bible in Post-Contemporary Language by UGn Ptrsn

In The Text Message, bestselling pastor Eugene (UGn) Peterson (Ptrsn) presents a 21st-century translation of Holy Scripture, written entirely in text message shorthand. Continuing in the tradition of the bestselling The Message — an accessible interpretation of Scripture for contemporary readers — The Text Message delves even further into the language of the masses, and especially of adolescents and teens. Says high school senior Katelynn Kerr, “When my mom gave me a copy of The Text Message, I was, like, so happy. I couldn’t even look at it for, like, hours, because I had to text all my friends to tell them about it.”

But Kerr surely made up the time through The Text Message’s super-concise passages. For example, the NASB version of Psalm 116:12-14 reads, “What shall I render to the LORD For all His benefits toward me? I shall lift up the cup of salvation and call upon the name of the LORD. I shall pay my vows to the LORD, oh may it be in the presence of all His people.” The Text Message boils these verses down to the bare essentials: "How 2 thnk Gd? Cheers! w/ Gd’s peeps." In the New Testament, Christ’s lamentation from the cross, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabacthani" becomes a piercing "OMG, R U there?" Kerr continues, “That old verse was in, like, Latin? Which is, like, so dead. But when I read ‘OMG, R U there?’ I was, like, speechless. ‘Cause I’ve texted that, like, so many times. It was like I finally understood what Jesus was feeling.”

Although The Text Message only hit bookstores yesterday, certain “it” celebrities are already on board: sources say Taylor Swift mass-texts her 4,000 closest friends “The Txt Msg Daily Vrs” every morning, and Ashton Kusher’s “John 11:35 G-zuz :'(” tattoo has been featured on several blogs. Although only Psalms, Proverbs, and the New Testament have been released so far, Peterson plans to translate the entire Bible. (A spokesperson for the Concerned Parents League has released a statement warning of a boycott in case the Song of Solomon is translated into “sexts.”)

When asked to comment on his hopes for the new “textlation,” Peterson replied that its brevity (the entire New Testament clocks in at a mere fifty-two pages) makes long verses the perfect size for 140-character-limit Tweets.

“In the beginning was the Word,” Peterson says. “And the Word was with God, and the Word was God. But while God remains the same, our concept of ‘Word’ changes, and we must engage the post-contemporary language.” Katelynn agrees: “Tru dat.”

More here